goal check

So, what were my goals for this year again? According to my year end post:

1) to get my blood sugar under better control

My hbA1c was about the same as it was in September – which is okay. Considering how badly I was eating last fall this is a win. My morning blood sugars and pre-meal blood sugars are coming down now and I’m starting to cut back on insulin. Fewer carbs, less junk and a little weight loss are all pointing to the possibility of getting back off insulin eventually.

2) to start losing weight again

I got a bit side-lined by the Dad situation and binge-ate my way through much of January, but I started Calorie King on January 21st. I’ve been logging my food and doing the various worksheets and started participating in the community forum. CK has some good features, it’s not perfect but it’s a good place to write things down and the support is pretty decent. A lot of the information provided is stuff I already knew but that’s always my frustration. I know what I need to do, I just don’t do it. That’s part of the whole cycle.

I decided to do things a little differently this time. I’ve said repeatedly that the best diet is the one you will stick with. I’m working at not trying to be perfect, to be reasonable in the changes I’m making. My first goal was to stick within their recommended limit of 2000 calories per day. For the most part, it’s been easy. I’ve had some bad days but I’ve gotten back up and started again. So long as I’m not eating junk food, I stay within my limit and don’t feel deprived. In fact, I’ve been below goal about a third of the time in February – which is not recommended. I’ve thought that I should lower my calorie goal but I’m still working on the getting to rehab goal, cars and illness have made that more difficult than it needs to be. Besides, I’ve lost 10 pounds in the past two weeks so I think I’m on target for the time being. I’ve been making other gradual changes in my eating; cutting back on bread and other carbs and adding more vegetables back into my diet. And not grazing all evening. That’s always a challenge but it’s improving.

3) to cook and post more interesting meals in the recipe blog

I have been cooking more but for the most part, nothing new. Cooking more, less eating frozen meals or crackers and cheese for dinner is helping. I’m getting more vegetables into my diet and have more control over carbs. I still want to cook more and post some new ideas, but I’m taking things slowly. I’m not jumping into that crazy obsessed place. New recipes will come.

and also 4) get back to rehab

Again, illness and car trouble and weather and Dad have conspired to make this difficult but I’m getting there. I’m trying to be smart about exercise too. I weigh more than I did when I was going regularly and I’m hurting a lot. So I’m easing into it slowly – just do something. Something is better than nothing. My main goal is just to get there three times per week. It’s really easy to talk myself out of going. And when I’m there, I’m working my way up to more strenuous exercise. At least now I am, since the first few times I went I could barely walk the next couple days. My body’s way of saying taking it a little more slowly.

But weight and eating and exercise aren’t my whole life. In some ways, it’s really easy to focus on them. Clearly there are other things going on and I’m still dealing with Dad and the house and such. I want to balance the Me goals and the goals I have to sort out the house, get out more and be more social, and deal the issues with the folks. And along with those, getting back to the shrink regularly would probably be a good thing.