Peabody, another recipe blogger that I really enjoy, but don’t really cook from her recipes, sometimes writes about loving your body. Yeah, that’s something I’ve always wanted. I think it’s possible, you know, if you’re not me. Or maybe I could learn to love my body if I was, you know, different. It’s wonderful that some people can do that. Love their body, even if they aren’t perfect. And Peabody is pretty straight about not being perfect. But she’s way more perfect than me.
I tell people that I accept who I am. I know that I am fat and ugly. I accept that. I’ll probably never change. I’ve tried and tried. And failed. So I accept who I am. I’d still like to be different and I’m not going to stop trying.
People tell me that’s not acceptance. That’s being negative. I should love myself the way I am. Well, yeah. I think it’s a good idea. I think that you tend to treat yourself better, in more healthy ways, if you love yourself. And I think that would be possible if I were, you know, thin and pretty. Or at least, less fat and less ugly. But the concept, yes, I think you should love yourself. I don’t, but I accept myself.
And that’s not good enough.
*I should clarify. I don’t hate myself. I hate the way I look. There are other things I like very much about myself.
[Disclaimer: Her most recent post about drinking problems bothers me. Sure, she might not have a drinking problem but I wouldn't want to blanket that story to all my friends who have or have had real drinking problems.]
The 28 day challenge sounds interesting. I’ve signed up for it but I’m afraid I don’t have any really big hopes at the moment. On the homepage, there are what I assume to be potential challenges for the month, like “Run in a field.” Yeah, that’s not going to happen. “Take a spontaneous roadtrip.” Spontaneous? Um, do you know what a challenge it is for me to drive even a short distance when I’ve planned to do it?
But I don’t want to be negative about it. There could be good in it and it’s a different perspective. And I could use a different perspective.
So, if you’re interested in playing along, you can sign up here. Starts September 3rd.